…when you can create it?  Reality, I mean.  Specifically yours.  Your way.  Why settle for what is, if what is isn’t satisfying?  If you are happy with how life is rolling, kudos and good on ya.  But, if you’ve ever felt that things could be better, this blog is for you.

Whether aware of it or not, we are all very busy creating our lives and all that happens to us.  When things go splat, a common knee-jerk reaction is to find someone or something to blame.  If you’re looking for short term relief, that’ll do.  Turning things around for the long run requires an alternate approach.  (I’ve done both and, for me, the second option brings longer lasting results and feels much better.)

"As Deep as the Ocean" Before (left) - watercolor on watercolor paper. After (right) - The original painting float-mounted on painted canvas panel.  I embellished details with more paint and crayon and deepened the shadow behind and around the heart for greater contrast.

If you have ever played the comparison game, you may have noticed, as you looked about, a lopsided distribution of who has what.  Usually, the first response is to rationalize (or soothe) by telling ourself that some people were born privileged or lucky, some have all the right connections, others have been guided by a mentor.  Bottom line:  Though it may not seem fair, it is.  What I mean is, we get what we think about.  We create the chaos or the cure.

Good news!  If we don’t like what we see, we can change this at any stage we choose.  (And it’s easier to do than you might think.  Keep reading.)

Most of us have been taught that actualizing dreams involves hard work along with its companions perseverance, follow through, and manning up.  When it works, it works.  When it doesn’t, it can be a disaster - the downward spiraling kind leaving one to wonder, “What’s wrong with me?”  This is a perfect example of using thinking to create chaos.

Chaos is multiplied when, in our confusion or frustration, we apply more of the same (hard work’s companions mentioned above) while telling ourselves, “I’ll double down this time; I’ll make myself do better!”  The pattern repeats, and multiple repetitions can become “just the way things are”.

We adapt, we compromise, we settle and sometimes we just stop trying.  The reasons are many, but the underlying factor is a sense of powerlessness.  And that’s not the truth.  We have far more control over our experience than we might realize.  It’s not we who are at fault, it’s our approach.

We’re either creating chaos or the cure.  The cure for me was learning this: Stop and look at what I’m thinking and then find some other thought or action that brings relief.  Ask: “What is the most positive thought I can find about this situation in this moment?”  Ask: “What one thing can I do right now to help myself feel better?”  I remind myself to not get too caught up in the outcome - just keep reaching for relief.  In a nanosecond, one can switch from passenger to pilot.

"Heartstrings" Before (left) - watercolor on watercolor paper.  This was one of two hearts I started while visiting Jean.  We had a lot of fun creating together in her studio. After (right) - The original painting float-mounted on painted canvas panel.  I tried a number of different background ideas before settling on just extending the heart like I did for “Ready For It” (see previous blog).  Good thing watercolor paints don’t build up like layers of oil paint.

Anyone here a Bill Murray fan?  Do you recall a movie titled “What About Bob?” starring Bill Murray as the whacked-out patient of psychoanalyst Richard Dreyfus?  The plot centered on Dreyfus’ attempts at teaching Murray the self-help methods outlined in his new book called “Baby Steps”.  Funny movie aside, my point is that sometimes the best positive thought or action available will be just a baby step from what’s going on.  A small change perhaps, but a change from what was, and worthy of celebration, as each micro step brings you closer to your true self and to all that you want to live.

I repeat: Find “happy” in as many moments as you can, don’t get too involved in the outcome, and the rest will fall into place.

Baby step, baby step, baby step…

Judy

Or…P.S.  Sometimes the best next step is to simply drop it.  Go get busy with anything other than what’s bugging you until something shows up to give you a direction to move in.

This unfinished watercolor painting has been on idle for about 3 years, maybe more…I don’t keep track (as I’m sure you understand).  I have many options so far (crop, collage, add texture and fluid acrylics, or cover it in gesso and start over) and none are speaking to me yet, so we're gonna continue staring at each other until someone blinks or I get an idea or I spill coffee on it…could be 3 more years.  Doesn’t really matter as I am still having so much fun doing this.  So, yay.

These are some recent do-overs, paintings that were stuck and needed rethinking. The Little Picture Show (coming up the first two weeks in September at The Arts at Marks Garage in Honolulu) is the perfect venue. 

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"Ready For It" before (left) and after (right). I float mounted the original onto a canvas-covered panel board and extended the painting onto that.  The lines match perfectly; my photo here is just off.  It was a game of: Place original on canvas board, look, lift original, paint, put down original, look, lift, paint.  A challenge and I loved it.  This piece really pops. 

NOTE: Original view reflects the true colors of this painting.  I took the after photo inside the condo late in the afternoon.  I do not recommend this…”

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"Here Then Gone" before version in progress (left) and the do-over (right). Ok, a lot changed: Cropped, molding paste applied for actual texture, more layers of paint applied and then lifted for added visual interest, and crayon for highlights and definition.  Kinda went crazy with it…

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“Dragonfly Dream” before (left).  A quarter sheet sized painting originally and look at the first wash colors!  I used masking fluid to create the dragonfly outlines and just kept changing the colors until I got stuck.  This one hung around a couple of years, patiently waiting for me to learn another technique to rescue it. The after (right) I cropped and applied hand painted papers in a mosaic pattern.  Really a lot of fun to do.

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"Daydreamin" before (left) and after (right). With this guy, I applied more watercolor paints, added texture with molding paste and kept painting that until I liked the colors, and I used crayon again to make changes that I could not do with paint alone.

Expect another letter soon with actual words and more photos like these...

Hope you are all enjoying the last bit of summer!

-Judy

I love it when a fresh, new idea pops into my head.  The surge of energy and enthusiasm makes me feel balloon-light and uplifts my soul.  Since I last wrote to you, I have been to France with Forrest and had the Best. Time. Ever!  Each trip becomes easier to negotiate and subsequently more fun.  (Kinda like life’s adventures, n’est pas?)  As I write and reflect, I realize that everything I’ve wanted has come to be…just not as I had expected.  (Different and improved versions I am happy to say.)

Me next to “Ancient Voices, Future Vision”, one of the paintings accepted into the Spring Hawaii Watercolor Society Show.

I talk a lot about being childlike and about the innate, expansive nature of children.  Watching a bug make its way across a leaf can become a whole world of wonder to a child.  Children are naturally open and receptive.  The feeling of connection to all things comes easily and without thought.  I hesitate to use the phrase “being in the now moment” as it seems trite with overuse.  But, gang, giving full attention to the now moment adds value to your life in the deepest, most profound way.  This is where your true self lives - your most powerful point of connection to the All That Is.

“Had Me Some Fun” first wash: Just laying down background color.

Which is where magic happens.  And it’s where I’ve been for the past few weeks.  Something shifted for me during the Sandra Duran Wilson workshop and I have been busily (contentedly) creating ever since.  I am myself again, connected to my happy place, feeling loose and free and guided in and outside of my painting play time.

Second Wash: Adding visual texture with a fabric wash and more colors.

The cool thing is that this easy flow is available anytime to us all.  The moment we slow down and let go, we open ourselves to that connection.  It’s not about making anything happen; no action is required.  Be present, be you, be quiet.  What do you want?  How do you want to feel?  What would right now make you feel better?  And then do or be whatever the answer is.

I remember as a kid being immersed in my moments and following impulses.  Left to my own devices, I pursued one desire:  What fun thing shall I do now?

Applied actual texture with paste.  You can see the first layering of colors on the sunflower.  I left the dot textures bare to show you what the paste stencil looks like.

I hear you.  What about when the “real world” calls?  What about work?  Or chores?  Or the needs of others?

I try this:  I ask myself, what would make this “have to” moment more fun?  I thought you might want to try this, too.  Start there and repeat.  Yeah, I’m nowhere near acing this; however, when I do remember to stop and ask, I feel buoyant.  And that’s winning in my book.

“Had Me Some Fun” finished!  This was a blast, let me tell you.

Feel as good as you can for as long as you can because that’s really all that matters.  (The rest will take care of itself.)  It’s all so much easier than we allow it to be.

Here’s to more fun!

Judy