My latest missive mentioned my belief in “(S)he who has the most fun wins.”  I’m a huge fan of fun, have been all my life.  Dropped many a project mid-stride because I had lost the joy of it and have been judged a quitter.  “Great starter, lacks follow through” was one comment.

Personally, I was happy that way.  My wrong turn was letting what others thought matter. A new idea sends me soaring, dreaming up possibilities, anticipating how it will take shape makes me happy.  Although I do feel satisfaction when I complete a not-so-fun-but-mandatory task, it’s just not the same.

I found this on a restaurant ladies room wall just as I was thinking about my big Q.

Which has nothing to do, really, with what’s on my mind these days.  I’m talking about the bright bubble of joy that comes from afresh new idea.  One that lights you up inside, infects others near you, makes you feel buoyant and energetic and connected to everything - that “can’t wait to hit the ground running” sort of feeling, like the first day of vacation when you were a kid and the promise of a whole lot of summer fun beckoned.

Viewing it this way, I see I’ve been pursuing my life’s purpose all along.  My real road wasn’t so much about making the expected and acceptable choices, although I did.  I have found and still find satisfaction with pursuing a career, buying a home, falling in love.  But by making most of my choices with an eye to what was expected of me, I lost connection with myself.  Rediscovering Judy has brought insight and I really don’t regret the route taken (although I do wish I’d found the me I am today a bit sooner).

This one was accepted by the Hawaii Watercolor Society Open Show in April 2016

If you’ve ever felt like you were an alien among strangers, you’ll understand what I’m about to say:  I was made to make art.  I was created to create.  I thrive on the rush that comes from a new idea for a painting or a sewing project or even a house make-over.  It feels like, “Ooh!  I’ve gotta go do this thing right now!”

That’s when I’m direct-lined to the deepest part of me, the part that’s always connected to the vast resource of the universe, to God, to whatever name you use.  It’s all-inclusive.  It’s magic, it’s electric, it’s me at my happiest.  I love living in this space.

Not always can I be there, not in the manner I just spoke of.  I think the magic of those moments can and should be found in the ordinariness of everyday life.  And maybe that’s the answer to the big Q of why are we here: finding the magic in as many moments as we can; feeling joy; loving ourselves inside and out; appreciating others; making messes and trusting that from those messes comes great opportunity.  

Maybe it’s as simple as being true to ourselves while honoring others whatever they are doing.  To have courage, to trust in our connection to the universe and to have the most fun we can think of along the way.

Let’s all go have some fun!

(And Jean, drink your milk…)

Judy

PS. “The thing is to become a master and in your old age to acquire the courage to do what children did when they knew nothing.”  Henry Miller

She’s Done! "Flamenco Moment"  (Compare this with my last blog and see if you can tell what more I did.)

Cheers to the New Year (yes, I am aware this is March already!) and to our resolutions, hopes, and dreams.  The moment brims with promise and I am eager and hopeful of what each New Year may offer.  A favorite memory, the start of a new school session, with the scent of freshly sharpened pencils, pages of fresh notebook paper, and anticipation of the unknown promise to come, is what I feel each January.  I also remember how homework, exams and term papers soon dampened my eagerness.

#1: First start.

Fortunately, I’ve come to revise my perception and pursuit of new starts; I integrate them daily, during the “homework” phase of my projects.  Every morning I remind myself that it’s a new day and that I am a new person in it.  This simple mental reminder refreshes my outlook in rewarding ways. I even use this technique during the day when I need that fresh-start rush.  I can quickly drop whatever is bothering me and, in an instant, open the way forward.  

#2: Developing an idea.

This approach has proved invaluable, not only with my creative process, but also my day to day encounters.  I’ve mentioned before how creating art is a metaphor for living: You have an idea or desire, you make a mark or a move, you acknowledge where you are, decide on the next step, then repeat, repeat, repeat.  

#3: Pursuing, pushing that idea.

I find this quick mind-change helpful, especially while painting. Just as in school, the first rush of excitement as I envision the new piece often devolves into a stop-start-stop-start process (necessary for maintaining the initial vision, but not as fun).  No painting (hope, dream, wish, or desire) ever turns out as you imagined, but what does show up just might prove to be better.

#4: Changing course.

Here’s to changes!

Judy

#5: I’ve put her away for awhile to reassess with new eyes.  I’m on to something new and need to let it percolate a bit.  I’ll know when to do more; the painting will tell me.  I may change what I’ve done or embellish what is or add more.  Stay tuned, more changes always to come...

P.S.  A recent card I drew from my OSHO Zen Tarot echoes these thoughts: “EXHAUSTION is about all the ways we set up safe but unnatural routines for ourselves and, by doing so, keep the chaotic and spontaneous away from our doors.  Life isn’t a business to be managed, it’s a mystery to be lived.”

Vacations are fun, stressful, rejuvenating, and often enlightening.  Forrest and I just returned from our biking trip in Provence.  Every time I travel, I observe more about myself.

Forrest and Judy in France with the landlady's dog Syrah who visited every day.

The Latin root of vacation is “vacatio” (exemption from duty) and the Latin verb is “vacare” (to empty).  Webster defines vacation as “a period of suspension of regular work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel.”  

A quick color sketch of France's equivalent to the US's Grand Canyon: "Les Gorges du Verdon."

Ok, so Forrest and I do the recreation and travel parts in spades.  Biking in France is an incredibly satisfying and rewarding experience (if you’re into that sort of thing).  The French are acutely aware of bicyclists, so you feel very safe on the road.  The areas we bike in are country/village-like surrounded by fields of sheep, horses, vineyards and orchards, punctuated by small villages containing little cafe/bars where you can get a fabulous lunch (with wine of course!) at a very attractive price.  Village people are friendly and meet us more than half-way when we try out our so-so French.  

Work in progress, the beginning stage, just drawing in the Leafy Sea Dragon after the first color wash.

We experienced many rewarding moments connecting with people in everyday transactions.  A food purchase goes something like this: We spend quite a bit of time determining what we want and then more time thinking about how to ask for it in French, then deciding to just go for it with what we know, followed by a lot of pointing and nodding or shaking of heads until the item we want is chosen.  Next, is trying to convey quantity, usually by the attendant indicating portions with a knife and us shaking our heads “no” until we get to “yes”.  

The same goes for every transaction of every day; the stress of that adds up. Figure in the 24 hours it takes to get to France, the stress of travel itself, finding your way in unfamiliar surroundings, translating all sorts of signage from roadways to train tickets to menus, and thinking and speaking in an unfamiliar language. 

Work in progress, the middle stage, starting to define Leafy Sea Dragon with negative painting.

So, why go?  The fearful part of me would have me not. I’ve allowed fear to limit my choices for too long.  I am so grateful to Forrest and pleased with my willingness to take risks.  Moving beyond my self-imposed limitations has enabled me to open this Website, to pursue my dream of being an artist, and to continue to create the life I’ve always wanted to live.  Everything moves forward hand in hand.  For me, that includes an increased appreciation for my creative self, a willingness to grow beyond previously accepted boundaries/expectations, an expanded view of myself and the world around me, and an eager anticipation of what’s to come.

The final piece, "Play Misty for Me" ©Judy Aveiro

As I first stated, the experience of travel enhances me.  I am so appreciative of the opportunity to travel; for the exposure to a different culture and country, especially one so beautiful and elegant; to find that there are other and (for me) better ways of living day to day.  I love the challenge of learning French and the reward of connecting to someone in another language.  I appreciate how the stress of travel has helped me to find my voice, to express what I want, to simply state what is best for me.  Traveling to France is amazing, but the journey inside myself means just as much.

Stay tuned!

Judy